Tuesday, January 02, 2007

This one's for Laura

If anyone ever gets the idea to make a porcelein doll fashioned after my child, please don't.

On New Year's Eve, Chris and I went to Phil and Laura's house to ring in the new year. At one point I needed to use the bathroom and was headed upstairs to use the one in their bedroom. Laura warned me that there was a doll on her bed and not to be alarmed. I was expecting one of those dolls similar to an American Girl or even one of those collector's dolls. What awaited me upstairs was worse than my imagination could ever have seen.

It was a life sized porcelein replica of Carley when she was 10 months old. She was dressed in a HUGE petticoat and had removable hair. Well, I don't think it was meant to be removable; I just think the glue just stopped sticking. When the hair was removed, there was a gaping hole in the back of her skull. She had this crazy grin on her face that would be cute if it were an actual child, but in a doll it was just freaky. She watched me as I slowly walked past her, trying not to make eye contact. I ran downstairs as fast as I could after I used the bathroom just to get away from her.

Chris wanted to see her so Laura brought her downstairs and they sat her down on a chair and she watched TV and hung out with us for the rest of the night. She was more wide awake than any of us were! Right after the ball was dropped, Chris and I headed home but Bizarro Carley was still awake and ready to party. I hope she didn't keep Laura and Phil up all night...


Carley's mommy said...

Okay I am so glad I just went to the bathroom before I read that-or I would be on my way home to change my drawers.
Well holey-headed Carley went to Grammy's today. I put her in the carseat and away she went-hair still not in tact but nothing super glue can't fix.
Hope she didn't give you nightmares, she's actually very sweet once you get to know her.

Erika said...

That is HILARIOUS! You can get dolls made to look just like your kid? SCARY! (But I've seen you can get life sized dolls made to look like people for naughty purposes, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised.)

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